Quotes by Fred Allen

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A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
    --Fred Allen 

COMMITTEE, n. A group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done.
    --Fred Allen 

A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.
    --Fred Allen 

I'm going to Boston to see my doctor. He's a very sick man.
    --Fred Allen 

A gentleman never strikes a lady with his hat on.
    --Fred Allen 

I can't understand why a person will take a year or two to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.
    --Fred Allen 

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
    --Fred Allen 

Man has made his bedlam; let him lie in it.
    --Fred Allen 

Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.
    --Fred Allen 

The last time I saw him he was walking down Lover's Lane holding his own hand.
    --Fred Allen